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My hands are so soft that I can't grasp my phone correctly

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Either I'm jetlagged or someone is hitting me in the head with a baseball bat in my sleep

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Texting whilst peeing is another useless skill to add to the list

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The laziest sunday you've ever seen

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In front of the tv, that's where you'll find me

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I love falling in love with new music

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i wish 'bonerific' was a word in the dictionary

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